we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Boobs speak an international language.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
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