please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
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