Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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