do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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