question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Randomize
