It's like a parade of train wrecks.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
This is the high leading the old right now
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
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