how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize