I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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