Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize
