I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize
