Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
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