last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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