I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
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