hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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