Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
I'm like, not good at living.
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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