Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
