i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
