remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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