dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
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her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
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