its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Randomize
