oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
