She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
In America we eat man semen.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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