What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
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