And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize
