I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
