Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
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