we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
