is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
His nipple licking is glorious
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