but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
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