So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
