so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Randomize