I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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