You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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