Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize