Soap is not a condiment
pop tarts are not kleenex
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I wish there were birth control emojis
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
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