forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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