Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
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