Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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