I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Randomize
