didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Cover your peen. We're going out.
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