Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
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