Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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