didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Pants are for mortals
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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