i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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