there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
