Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
