The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize
