You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Randomize
