I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.