i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
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a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
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They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.