Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She bit a glass in half.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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